On Zombies and Goths

I was thinking. Never a good sign.

Worse, I was thinking about myself, a professional activity which should only be carried out by professionals, otherwise angst poisoning has been known to spontaneously cause black lipstick and eyeshadow to appear, advanced cases of bad taste regarding one's ensemble, one's hairstyle to mutate, and, in severe cases, cause piercings to appear in awkward places.

The angst zombie, otherwise known as the goth, is usually looked down upon by other zombies, who consider their constant moans of 'Life is paaaaaaaain', 'No one understaaaaaaands me', and other such to be not only nontraditional, but redundant and, frankly, stupid. They know damn well life is pain, but damned if they're going to whine about it. After all, traditional moans should be forward-looking. Life may be pain now, but, with luck, the future may hold some delicious and nutritious brains, so why not belt out a nice 'braaaaaaains' and look to the future, instead of dwelling on the past?

Angst zombies, naturally, would be quite delighted with the situation if they were delighted about anything, since it gives their moans versatility and, as far as they're concerned, added weight. Of course, no one really cares, but the more they're oppressed by not being the center of the universe, the more excuses they have to whine about it.

The tone of voice is another sore point between angst zombies and regular zombies. Zombies, after all, pride themselves on their deep, rich, low-pitched announcements of future desire. Angst zombies, on the other hand, emit their calls in often in a high-pitched whining that is quite annoying, particularly when you've had time to admire the natural calls a regular zombie emits...from out of arm's reach, preferably. People do tend to have an inexplicable attatchment to their brains, even if a fair majority don't use them. They're probably concerned that the removal process would leave a scar which would mar their perfect faces forever.

...y'know, I had a point to all this when I started, but I think I prefer this to deep self-exposition. Lord knows it'll be more amusing.

Enjoy, y'all.